Back in the Saddle

This week I went back to work. The fact that it feels like it's been a week and it's only Tuesday says a lot about my experience returning.

I spend most of my day worrying/wondering about my family, especially its newest member, my nephew KJ. It doesn't really help me get anything done and generally just adds to my feelings of estrangement and being homesick.

I'm hoping for word that no further treatment for my cancer is needed and I can begin to move on. As much as I thought I needed to get away from my family (and maybe I did), I miss them tremendously.

Longer ago than I care to think about I was working on a script about a man that returns to his hometown and his family after being away for years. I even had a tag line: "What if everything you ever wanted was in the last place you ever wanted to be?"

Apparently I was just predicting my own future. Except the dude was a successful writer or some such ridiculousness.

I also watched Blade Runner 2049 this weekend. I liked it, even if it's a bit laborious and naval-gazing.

The one thing that struck me is the idea of both realizing and accepting the fact that you (we? I? whatever) are a supporting player in someone else's narrative. Naturally our world revolves around us, our wants, needs, desires, problems, etc. But recognizing that you are part of a bigger tapestry and figuring out how to make an impact that farther reaching than just your own life is maybe the meaning of it all. Lots to unpack and that's definitely an incomplete thought.